Tom Zacharias is a teenage tennis champion and former schoolmate to the future King of Sweden. Tom Zacharias is a struggling actor and Lenny Bruce-esque performance artist, arrested for urinating on his audience at a posh performance space. Tom Zacharias is a Swedish pin-up boy of 1970, described as a “hairy lion” with a “charming smile and virile charm”.

Tom Zacharias is a controversial recording star, with a murderous keyboardist that comes to the studio in handcuffs with a police escort. Tom Zacharias has the biggest Swedish funk record of 1975, Belinda, and it can only be bought through porn shops and mail-order ads in men’s magazines. Tom Zacharias is an award-winning children’s music performer, squashed into obscurity by the unstoppable Smurfs. Tom Zacharias is a kooky television personality and star of a bizarre televized enema championship.

You can (and must, really) buy Tom Zacharias’ Belinda from the rad online reissue label Anthology Recordings. The amazing first six tracks on the album are in English, recorded for a North American version of Belinda that was to be sold through Hustler and Screw. However, no one bothered to convert their dollars into Krona and the album never sold a single copy. Thus, these rare English recordings of Zacharias’ ridiculously explicit funk masterpieces had never been heard until Subliminal Sounds re-issued the album in 2004.

This shit is crazy. If you like Gravy Train!!!!, Peaches, or Karen Finley you will love Zacharias’ groove-tastic explorations of scat, incest, fetish and rape. Check out “Nice Cooks” from Belinda below.

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+ Get Belinda from Anthology Recordings.